The Danger of Inadequate Child Protection Policies
Inadequate child protection policies are often more dangerous than the absence of a policy because nominal policies allow church members to believe that they are safe when they are actually in grave danger.
An Introduction to Child Liberation Theology
In today’s world that sees children as having no rights themselves, but rather sees parents as almighty rulers over their property, Jesus’s point stands out. By lifting up children, Jesus really is making the last first. He is making clear that children deserve the same rights, and bear the same value, as adults.
Protests, Apologies, and Zaccheus
The role of the surface apology is not repentance or restitution. The purpose of a surface apology is twofold: to make the person you hurt go away and to absolve you of your own guilt.
So how do you issue a sincere apology and work towards restitution if you have wronged someone? And conversely, what type of apology and restitution should you expect if you are wronged?
Dear LGBTQ+ Survivors
We want you to know that we are a safe space for LGBTQ+ survivors and we value your stories and your partnership as we learn and grow. We are proud to stand alongside our LGBTQ+ survivors and support them as we all heal from our experiences at CFC.
Emotions & Abuse: Part 2
God created us with emotions. Our God-given emotions keep us safe, help us live an abundant life, and motivate us to take action based on our values and goals.
Emotions & Abuse
I was and still am a serious Christian, and it was important to me to obey God. But I thought that meant I had to do things that felt really bad to me. If it felt hard, that was probably God telling me to do something.
Leaving Well
Leaving a church is not a decision most Christians take lightly. It is especially difficult where intergenerational friendships have taken shape, discipleship, marriages, births, baptisms, and deaths have stitched a fabric which you were convinced kept you warm. This fabric has been a comfort. A barrier to outside elements threatening your safety and security. You feel safe.
Broken Arrows: Our Emotions
By “othering” personal thoughts, CFC trains children and adults to be constantly at odds with themselves in a state of passive indecision that looks for outside direction. CFC leadership then offers church-approved philosophies, practices, and opinions as though they are God-ordained truth, keeping members trapped in the vicious codependence of high-control authoritarian communities.
Broken Arrows: Our Bodies
When parents deny children basic human rights of bodily autonomy, agency, and privacy, their children learn that their bodies are not their own but always under the authority of someone else. The practice of deliberately humiliating and breaking a child’s spirit lays harmful groundwork for their future relationships as adults, teaching them that love means submitting to abusers who claim authority over their bodies.
Broken Arrows: Obedience
Training children to respond to instructions with nothing but immediate and cheerful obedience (under threat of physical and emotional harm) leaves no room for a child to question whether the instructed activity is safe for them.
Training children to obey adults without questioning the why behind the command prepares them to do the same with any authority figure in the future.
Broken Arrows: High Control Religious Communities and Abuse
The Broken Arrows series names and identifies the layers of harm contained in CFC’s approach to child training. This type of child training sets children up for abuse by teaching them erroneous beliefs about themselves and their place in the world.
We are all complicit
One of the most complicated truths to acknowledge is that we have harmed others, yet this is an essential step in the journey to wholeness. There is freedom in acknowledging that we have been complicit in harm. It allows us to seek forgiveness, offer restitution, and find grace for ourselves and for others.
Counting the Cost
For those of us who still identify as Christians, we understand that our lives are dedicated to Christ. We understand that Christ calls us to seek justice, even when it’s uncomfortable. We understand that our faith often puts us at odds with political parties. Our faith calls us to support the people around us – we help them move with our pick-up trucks and fifteen-passenger vans, we bring meals and take care of their older children when they have a baby, we lend them our generator when their power is out.
But there is a hidden cost that we didn’t count on: the cost of leaving Christian Fellowship Center.
Understanding Domestic Violence
Domestic Violence impacts every community regardless of race, culture, or socioeconomic status. On average, nearly twenty people per minute are physically abused by an intimate partner in the United States. One in four women and one in nine men experience some form of severe intimate partner violence at some point in their life.
On Grieving the Loss of a Church
If you are feeling shame or disillusionment over leaving your church, you are not alone. Spiritual abuse and other types of abuse destroy lives. They leave a trail of broken souls in their wake.
Librarians are the best
If you’re interested in a book-length exploration of a certain topic but you don’t have the financial resources to purchase your own book, never fear! The librarians at Potsdam Public Library have purchased many books from our resources list and they can be requested from anywhere in the North County Library System.
The danger of denial
Listening to survivors tell their stories can be uncomfortable, especially if they name abuse that does not seem to align with what you have experienced.
No, you’re not crazy
Abusive churches excel at gaslighting people. They taught you to distrust your own body, your own emotions, and your own sense of reality.
An Open Letter to CFC Members
We write to you as former members of Christian Fellowship Center. Some of us left recently. Some of us left years ago.
We are survivors of abuse at Christian Fellowship Center. We have experienced spiritual, emotional, physical, and sexual abuse at the hands of CFC leaders and members.