“The ax forgets; the tree remembers.” I didn’t know this old African proverb until I was much older, but it has grounded me on many occasions when I’ve been told I’m not remembering things correctly or it wasn’t that bad and I should just get over it. The abuser has the luxury of forgetting, but I still carry the ax’s scars as reminders.

I didn’t know at that time that all this craziness we had been living with for 16-plus years was typical domestic abuse. I had been in denial for a long time, but I was at the precipice of educating myself and opening my eyes to what my children and I had endured. The veil was about to be lifted as to the real Rick Sinclair and the Christian Fellowship Center cult.

Virginity. The trophy of womanhood. The uncrumpled rose. The unchewed gum. The thing every good Christian man required and desired. Purity. A wife unspoiled.

I was the poster child for it.